Infatuation vs Romantic Love

Infatuation- The intense absorption we feel for another, lots of passion.
Romantic Love- Idealized by our society, is a mature deeper attachment, and has a high degree of caring for another, is usually long term love.

   I find it is often hard to differentiate between infatuation and actual love. I recently was completely infatuated with this boy, and found it impossible to keep him off my mind. I thought this was love, but really was just an obsession caused by an encounter. I can use my knowledge now and be aware of when it is love, and when it is infatuation. I cannot use this in the classroom as far as I'm aware.

David Buss Idea on Attraction

                I agree with David Buss’ perspective on attraction; however I think it needs a little vamping up. In the past girls were in love with those strong men that could provide for the family. Presently that is the basis of our attraction but not the limits. Also we can add personality traits to choosing mates. These include humor, friendliness, respectfulness, and physical attraction. I strongly agree with the terms propinquity and reciprocity in choosing a mate. It would be nearly impossible to have a boyfriend that does not find you attractive, also long distance relationships never work in my experience. Unless both partners are equally busy and are secure enough with themselves it is very difficult to sustain a long distance relationship. I have never tried a long distance relationship because I am very needy and need lots of attention. I would also be worried about faithfulness while in this relationship, both of myself and of my partner.

Caster Semenya

            Upon hearing of the whole Caster Semenya debate I have formed a very strong opinion. I feel as though it is very important to find out whether or not Caster is male or female. It would not be such a serious debate if she wasn’t a world class athlete. The main concern is preserving the fairness for all competitors in the sport, and this is completely reasonable. She must understand that it is not us pressuring her to change; it is the concern of fairness.

Gender Challenges

 

I think Marilyn Manson is a very good example of someone who challenges gender. Whether it’s his extensive makeup, platform boots, or photo shoots that portray him as a girl there’s definitely something androgynous about this fellow. To build on this Marilyn writes poems, is a musician and is quite sadistic. Being known as the king of the devil, you have to expect some eccentricities. If someone was shown a photo of Marilyn and was unaware of him prior you might consider him a transvestite. He pushes boundaries in more way then his gender, especially with his provocative obscene videos. I don’t think his sexuality has anything to do with his portrayal of gender, he is completely heterosexual.

On the other hand females that challenge gender seem to all lesbians. These women are highly masculinised, and are the ultimate tom boys. These individuals have short boyish hair, and some have prominent cheek bones.

The views we have that determine whether people are masculine or feminine and gay or straight come from very early in life mainly in schools. We can prevent these ideologies by talking to our children and explaining the importance of not judging people based on looks.

Symposium

In the ancient times there was the idea of a primordial hermaphrodite which was introduced by Aristophanes. Primordial hermaphrodites were individuals that were both sexes. He uses this theory to explain attraction between mankind. At one time these individuals were split in two creating two separate beings; one male and one female or two males or two females. Now we are forever in a battle to rejoin with our other half. I love this theory and find it so extremely romantic.  Also we learned that a pseudo hermaphrodite is an individual with both the internal organs of one sex with the external sex organs of the other sex. I feel very bad for these individuals in western cultures because of the negative image that is correlated with hermaphrodites. I could not imagine living with this problem.

Gender Typing

Gender typing is the process of acquiring one's appropriate behaviors. The book describes 2 biological perspectives and 4 psychological perspectives. I agree most with the evolutionary perspective, and the social cognitive approach. It makes perfect sense that men nowadays yearn to be strong, and the protectors, and the providers, because in ancient times they were expected to do this.

I agree with the social cognitive theory because I learned the most by observing my mom and dad and how they act.  I also learned what not to do based on how my parents acted, therefore they modelled me into who, and who I do not want to become as an adult.

I disagree most with the Oedipus Rex complex. I find it very hard to believe that when I was younger I secretly wanted to have a penis. Also the idea that young boys unconsciously want to kill their fathers is absurd. When boys are young they love male attention and their dad’s are their biggest fans. Why would you want to kill your role model?

It is impossible for Freud to know what is going on in the unconscious mind, therefore any theory that he comes up with in regards to our unconscious cannot be disproven, because it cannot be proved.

Psychological Androgyny is something that I thought was much more rare then 1 in every 1000 people. I would like to know how these people deal with being a pseudo hermaphrodite and how their cognitive development works. I quite enjoy Socrates myth that at one point in time there were primordial hermaphrodites, and the reason men are attracted to women is their eternal desire is to rejoin.

Gender: A Social/ Cultural curriculum

                Gender is something that is learned from society and our culture. They are roles that we are assumed to perform, in order to be accepted in society. If these roles are not performed correctly people may become confused and neglect this individual. I completely agree that there are gender roles, yet as the years go by in western society the roles become less and less defined. Girls used to be expected to wear dresses and be homemakers that did everything their husbands said without question. Now only subtle differences are in place such as the topics that are appropriate for women to discuss. Also there is the double standard that men can sleep with whomever they want, which makes them cool, yet if women do this it makes them a whore or a floozy. I have often witnessed females being called names by men who do the same thing which is sleep around.

                Also we learned about Stereo types and sexism, I do not approve of stereo types or sexism. However there are assumptions that because at one time or even on one occasion a group of people did something, that every member of this group will always act this way. This is a part of life and as western society is becoming more multicultural, stereotypes and sexism are slowly becoming a thing of the past.

                Aggression as being equally possessed by both of the sexes does not come as surprising. When I was younger I was very aggressive, sometimes more aggressive then the boys. One time in middle school I threw a solid ice chunk at a boy’s head because he called me a name. If girls were rude enough or did horrible things to me I did not resort to talking instead I preferred to solve problems with my fists. I am not claiming that these methods were the most effective; however people seldom did cruel things to me for years after those fights.

Sexy Inc

From the video sexy inc. I have become aware of the pressure on young girls to be overly sexual and provocative. I have noticed this myself when I used to pick up my sister from middle school. Girls are becoming sexually active younger than ever before, and are thinking about image way to early. It is true that they have been robbed of their childhood.

I wasn’t even interested in sexual encounters until the age of 16, and my sister has been talking about her friends giving blow jobs since they were 12. To hear that even younger children are becoming sexually active scares me.

A child's mind isn’t even developed enough to understand sexual activity yet alone enjoy it at such a young age. It is scary and dangerous that young girls think it is normal to engage in these activities. I wish there were more programs out there that help inform girls at young ages the negative implications of being sexually active so early. If these programs existed hopefully they would understand that they don’t have to give away their bodies, because it is not a boy’s right to be sexually satisfied.

 My hope is that by the time I am a teacher girls are aware of self respect, and if not I will help to implement this in my classroom.